 Often in meditation I will get messages. After grounding, I received inspiration for a guided meditation and as I began to record my thoughts on my phone voice recorder, this came through instead.
From a distance I can see a tiny light beginning to glow, like a sparkle. It swirls and dances around me. Eventually it lands on my knee. And I can now see that it’s a small fairy. She is light and happy. She has an iridescent tone to her and she radiates sparkles and she communicates through her mind. She greets me with a bow. She says she is part of earth energy and she comes to welcome us as we reconnect to mother earth. She is here to show us the magic that exists in every moment. She is here to show us that our connection to mother earth may have been forgotten but it has not been lost. To feel the magic, all you have to do is reconnect physically, or even just in your mind. She represents the unseen worlds and the magic that the earth carries. You may call on her and she can help you manifest, ideas, dreams, thoughts and magic.
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 In the US we have a holiday we call Thanksgiving. I remember this time many years ago. I was in 3rd grade, cutting out shapes and glueing them together to create Pilgrim hats, buckles for shoes and little doily collars. We cut out orange, yellow and brown turkey feathers and believed a story we were told about Pilgrims and Native Americans coming together to celebrate friendship and the fruits of the land. I now understand this, and so many other stories we were told as children, to be fabricated tales of convenience. And although I was not there to witness the thousands of scenes as they played out across these vast lands of the Americas, I feel the stories of both joy and sorrow that the land remembers.
I found this over the weekend as I was going through some old files deciding what I could recycle and what needed to be shredded. It was tucked in amongst my divorce papers. Thousands of pages of legal filings, custody assessments, attorney fee statements, copies of horrible email and notes I'd received from my ex-husband and more.  It was back around 2005 or so. I was packing my bag, tucking away my notepad and pen, preparing to leave the office of the second attorney I'd hired to help me navigate a custody battle.
 What is the ego?
After a brief discussion with a friend regarding the ego, my curiosity got the better of me and I began to explore what it is and what it means. Ego: noun - a person's sense of self-esteem or self-importance. The psychoanalytic definition says it’s: the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity. The philosophic definition says it: a conscious thinking subject. In the spiritual community I often hear people refer to their ego as problematic or make statements that would lead me to believe they would like to tame or negate their egoic identity as if it is something to overcome or transcend. The art of receivingAs a woman who grew up in the 70’s and early 80’s, I, like many other girls my age, were shaped by a societal belief that IF I should choose a career outside the home, I should choose to be a school teacher, a nurse, a stewardess, a secretary, or maybe a bookkeeper or a switchboard operator. Still a carry over from the time of the “Woman’s Lib” movement that began in the 60’s, it was believed by many that a woman’s place was in the home, taking care of children, keeping a tidy home and attending to the needs (and often rules) of their husbands.
 I had lunch with a friend yesterday and the topic of past lives came up. He shared with me that he was told that he was an old soul and that in one of his past lives he was a monk.
As I recalled the conversation this morning it got me thinking about my own past lives. Nine of them that I have recalled on my own so far (plus more that I have been told about). Not the entire life from start to finish, but scenes, bits and pieces. I believe each of them were significant at the time the memory came to my awareness to facilitate an understanding or remembrance that could serve me in that moment, and each carries a fragment of who I am today. They are interesting, and not so interesting, great and ordinary. I remember being a Celtic healer, I remember being a man hunting in the woods with a bow and a knife so that I could provide for my wife, I remember being a native American woman, I remember watching my village burn down as a young woman in Asia, I remember having dark skin and laughing while running barefoot through a lush landscape, I remember being a tall and slender dancer, I remember being a guard for a queen and I remember being a boy with horse. Meditation, Thursdays & Manifesting
 Events, people and emotions from your past are likely resurfacing now or will be soon. These are memories you thought were resolved, put away or had already been dealt with. You are being asked to re-examine traumas, family secrets and possibly difficult memories as part of your process for growth. You may see little reminders, signs, pictures, articles, headlines, movies, etc., make their way to your awareness in an uncanny way that reminds you of something from your past as it tip toes back to be dealt with in a different way. It needn’t stick around for long, it’s just popping back in to be neutralized with new and fresh understanding.
This morning, as I sat contemplating and trying to understand a crystal message I was to deliver to the collective today, my eyes landed on a hawk feather resting on the cabinet under my TV. I crossed the room and picked up the feather I was gifted a few months ago (one of many serendipitous and freaky-cool occurrences this past summer) and just held it.
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Writing releases the thoughts you didn't know you had.
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